Another year has come & gone so quickly ..
I thought that 25 was going to be the best year of my life. I had my family, I was in a happy relationship, I had the best group of friends in the entire world, I had a steady job. What more could I ask for? And while I had some great memories, I have to be honest.
I lost a dear friend, someone I loved & most importantly, myself.
I allowed my anxiety and depression to take over, my insecurities to be louder than my self-love, my physical health went downhill, and I was just depleted. All of my relationships with people that I thought would be in my life for years changed, and that for me was a really difficult thing to accept and let go of.
A close friend of mine was in a car accident, and I took it as a wake up call for myself and the way I had been viewing life lately. After finding out that he was going to be okay, we had a heart to heart conversation and I asked him ” after this experience, what are you going to more of with your time? And less of? “
And then I realized, why am I asking him these questions and not myself? Life is too short and precious for anyone to take it for granted. I should know this with all of the people I’ve lost in my life, so I should start acting like it.
I’m writing this because things aren’t always rainbows and butterflies, though they may appear like it. I’m writing this so that people know that it’s okay to not be okay. I want the stigma of mental health to be shattered. I’m not ashamed to say that I was (and will be again) in therapy, and that I am constantly working on becoming the best version of me every damn day.
I am human, I make mistakes, I have setbacks. But this past year has shown me clarity on what I truly want in life. I’ve never grown so much of a person than I have these past 6 months.
I am proud to be myself, flaws & all. And though I am far from perfect, I know that I am exactly where I’m meant to be. Again, I can’t thank God, my family, gf’s, and all my friends enough for all supporting me during all of my highs and my lows.
I would not be who I am and where I am without you all. I love you all.
And remember:
Be honest. Be intentional. Be kind. Be patient. Be brave. Be loving. Be understanding. Be generous. Be YOURSELF.26 .. I’m ready for ya!
With Love,
Murs xx
little murs x big world 